Ace's WAY-OFF-Broadway Tunes

With apologies to Lerner and Lowe and you and you

(and maybe Rogers & Hammerstein, too?)

Sung to various Broadway Tunes - With apologies and recognition to the various authors of these tunes, who, if they were still alive, might even like what I have wrotten !!!.

All Lyrics Copyright © Azar Attura 1984, 1992, 2000

I Hate to Get Up in the Morning

(Sung to "Get Me to the Church On Time")

I hate to get up in the morning.

When the alarm begins to chime.!

I am so Fed Up

Trying to Get Up!

I never get to bed on time..!

I party like there's no tomorrow,

Dining on Caviar and Wine!

But when the day comes,

My eyes feel like bread crumbs!

I never get to bed,

I never get to bed.

I never get to bed on time!!!

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"Cockeyed Octopus"

(Sung to the tune of Cockeyed Optimist")

I just CAN'T co ordinate my tentacles.

All the fish swimming by me laugh out loud!! (hahaha!)

And they call me a Cockeyed Octopus!

I'm so tired of flailing around!

I'm so hungry! Please send something down!!!

When a fishie swims by me I reach out to it.

But it always is JUST beyond my grasp!

I'm a starving and cockeyed Octopus!

In this business I'm not gonna last!

I should see an optometrist FAST!!

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"There's No Fishes Like Goldfishes!"

(Sung to the tune of: There's No Business Like Show Business!")

There's NO fishes

Like Goldfishes

Like NO fishes I know!

They are always hungry

For their FISH FOOD!

They can eat you

Out of house and home!

Fancy ones can cost

More than a LINCOLN!

You'll soon be thinkin

You bought PURE GOLD!!!!

There's NO fishes

like Goldfishes

Like NO fishes I know.!

When you clean their tank

They'll MESS IT UP AGAIN!

There's NO escapin'

Your fishie friends!

But you'll never hear them

Scratchin' on the door, and

They WON'T Pee on the floor!!!!

They WON'T Pee on the floor!!!!!!!!!

(cha cha cha!)

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